I’m recounting my experience with covid so that people will get aware of this malady if they unfortunately face this fact. There is a wide range of symptoms which people report, pre covid, during covid, and post covid. I hope what I recount will aid others to get aware and be on a look out, for themselves, for their loved ones and for their relatives and friends.

Towards the end of June last year, 2020 I was hit by covid. Prior to this, I had the following symptoms;

1. Loose motions with froth or foam-like substance which accompanied the stool. The usual/normal motion takes time and effort (and leisure) but a covid-shit takes no time. It’s shit-in-a-minute. Meaning, I used to go, sit on the pot and baam! It’s over. All clear. The look of the stool was like Goats droppings with shampoo or soap froth. You know what I mean.
2. Another symptom was, my tailbone, the butt on which I sit, started to ache a few weeks prior to my diagnosis. I’ve been sitting cross legged since childhood, and since May 2017, I’ve become a regular butt-sitter. My bed is my regular work place where I sit or sleep, as I desire. I was never afflicted with Tailbone pain before and after covid, but the weeks leading up to my final “fall,” I had tremendous discomfort in that region. I cursed myself for never having a regular work table, etc., etc.. Here is another one recounting similar happenings.
3. The third symptoms, which initially I blamed on my obesity and lack of exercise, was my complete and utter exhaustion. If I even walked up to my toilet and peed and came back, I used to lie down with total tiredness.
4. Then finally, I developed a fever and and I used to have two paracetamol 500 tabs ever two hours just to keep the fever below 103 deg and to 99 or 100. I finished all Crocin whatever was lying at home, got my sister to get stock from her house, finished that too, then my sister went out to get some more and finished that too. Finally, due to COVID warnings or whatever, the medical shop started refusing to sell paracetamol without any covid negative test report. The medicine was finally procured from elsewhere but by that time everyone in the house knew that there was something wrong with me. No one, not even me, suspected covid.

I was suspected of Dengue. The reason being; since 24th March 2020 till my final fall to COVID in last week of June 2020, I may be the only person in this world to have followed the covid protocol strictly. I never stepped a foot outside the house. I don’t even remember opening the main door. Seclusion and solitary confinement is no problem to me and here I can beat Nelson Mandela. After few days of Dengue tests, I finally took the covid test and within two days thereafter, I was honored with covid Positive report.

Also, along with covid test, my doctor advised me to also take HRCT (High-resolution computed tomography). The LINK HERE is my report and this will give an idea as to the destruction this virus can wreak on a human body. No wonder I used to get extremely tired walking just a few steps. I’ve had breathing problems since birth and being allergic to many things, I was adviced hospitalization, just to have the oxygen handy, if need be.

5. In the hospital I had two strange occurrence.

a. The calf muscle on my right feet suddenly developed pain, and the pain travelled up and down the calf muscle. I just couldn’t make out what could have triggered this “cramp” as I was prone on the hospital bed most of the time watching non-stop Hindi movie songs. At home, I never see these but in the hospital, there was no Netflix. I heard this song so many times, that it became my favorite. Particularly the dance.

Then those medicines started coming in and I was surprised that corona had medicines. Most of them were Vit C, Vit D, anti Acid – but one of them was called – “Clopilet.” Armed with my iPad, which is my another appendage, I google the medicine and found that it’s a sort of “blood thinner.” And later, it may have been instrumental is curing my right calf muscle cramp. Now, I can say, I did have a blood clot and I was fortunate to have been attended to.

b. Around the same time, in the hospital, a largish circular “Goosebump” kind of a Skin Eruption occurred on the back side of my right thigh. It was not painful in the beginning. Over the course of next three to four months, that skin-eruption developed into a pussy boil with no discernable “head.” Gradually it subsided.

When I was in the hospital, my father, mother and sister all were diagnosed covid positive but they were all asymptomatic and quarantined at home. After the quarantine period, our family doctor advised “Venous Doppler” tests on both limbs to all. This was to find any blood clot which may develop as a result of covid and which can travel to the brain or heart and cause fatality.

Thus the malady. Hope this helps, to be aware of the things that may happen, leading to, during and after covid.

In my opinion, the covid test is just an indication. The damage the virus does can be determined by HRCT and “Venous Doppler” tests and also the use of “Blood Thinners.”

HRCT saved me as I became aware of my lung deterioration which made me go to the hospital prior to emergency. In the hospital, I was never on oxygen but my room had oxygen saturation increased.

The “Blood Thinner” was a boon to me inadvertently. Had I not being hospitalised, I wouldn’t have known or taken this medicine.

Post covid, Venous Doppler is important, just to be safe and not let a grain of blood clot which if undiagnosed and untreated, may travel from limbs to the heart and brain. If it doesn’t cause death, it may cause something more disastrous – paralysis.

Even if your immunity saves you from covid, there are other things you should take care of. I’ve listed my own experience.

I’ve written on this topic, here, here, here and here. And here is a play I wrote long time back which typifies an office environment.

After writing some on “manual surveillance” I’m veering towards surveillance of the “Tech-Kind.” These are not opinions only but my experiences too; things that happened to me. And if you are not careful, it’ll happen to you, too.

Recently, Apple launched “Airtag” and (frankly) I did not have a clue of what it is. Then when I knew it, after watching YouTube videos, I found Apple is not the first one to make such a device and there are others in the market, and these are pretty popular – “in the western world.”

But who the hell will buy “Airtag” or other “tag” like devices in India?

Imagine, losing your bag and with an airtag attached to it. I’m hundred percent sure, in India, your phone “may” guide you to the “tag” sans the “bag.” Besides, I still doubt you’ll get the “Airtag” too.

Here is my story about “tagging” of another kind.

A decade back (2011), after a drinking binge I walked up to my car and before opening the door I decided to have a smoke. I deposited my iPad and iPhone on the roof of my car. Having finished smoking, I entered the car and drove off. The devices on the roof may have clattered and clanged on the road near my usual bar.

Upon realising what I had done, I went to icloud.com/find to locate my devices. Obviously, anyone who may have picked my phone and pad, did the first important thing. They switched it off. On the browser, I put both my Apple devices on “Lost Mode,” and “Erase Mode,” with message and phone number for any generous angels. I had also remotely password locked those devices so that if any one even tries a password for once, the device will self erase and me getting an SMS with location. Or so I believed.

Then I did the next best thing ever expected out of only me in this world. Next day I went back to the bar and told everyone what all I have done to trap the person who, by now, was my culprit.

A guy like me, in that bar, and who tips pretty good left, right and centre, is always trailed and watched. I know this for sure. I’m pretty certain that many known eyes would have seen me take off and also seen those devices fall of the car-roof. And my next days idiotic brag would have tipped off the culprit for certain.

My two devices probably was never switched on, or, if its SIMs were removed, never got a whiff of any Wi-Fi. Well, why would anyone interested to steal would enter a Wifi password. Yes, the SIM’s were blocked later when no angels showed up.

It must be added here (and it must not be missed) that on the day, or rather the night, when I lost my devices by placing it atop my car, I was not alone. I was with my colleagues, one of them was from my previous company. This “previous-company colleague” had made a career out of “Khabaree-giri,” (snooping and informing higher management). I know this guy since the day I started my career.

After the above incident, only a day or two may have passed, and I was standing beside my car on my office parking – with my “new iPad and iPhone” atop my car roof. At the same time, another car rolled in and stopped beside me, and out peeked a Higher Management and remarked – “Don’t put it on the roof, you’ll again lose it.” I was struck; I literally had my mouth wide open. I immediately knew who reported it and the utter shamelessness of it all. It had not taken him much time to let the news to flow; I can imagine him not sleeping the night and divulge it to the management “first thing next morning.”

So, some tagging don’t work. But some do. Tagging literally means Labelling, for identification. And in this world, this #tag, is an important function.

“Airtag” as is feared, can be used as surveillance. This has been disputed as “Airtag” cannot be used as tracking device on others as their iPhone will alert them. What’s been left unsaid is that if the technology is there, who prevents a third party to devise such a useful device?

In these days of smart devices, there are many more ways to know what people are doing with their time. Such information is important. If you are not doing the work of the company, you are doing the work against the company and this information in your colleagues hands will be used against you in the first meeting everyday with higher management. Any crap information will do. The higher management love entourage, a crowd of yapping sycophants in their cabin, to feel important. In this world, sycophancy to any power is free because it feeds on scraps of promises. Even the bosses smile will do for that day.

In the beginning of my career, I used to go to work with a book in my hands. I realised after a few days, that this was one undesirable behaviour in the world of corporate illiterates. “You know, he reads books,” such expressions started to make rounds till I stopped carrying it. But by that time my reputation was tainted.

In my last company too, there has been numerous occasions when, with my attention is engaged elsewhere, I’ve noticed colleagues fiddling with my iPad. Many of them act ignorant of the device but they exactly know where to go in the ipad and which options to click to know the history of your net-whereabouts.

Smart Devices these days have made it very easy to get information on anyones engagement of his days. Take iDevices. Screen Time has made it easy for anyone to know how the owner of the device is spending his days. And if you cannot access Screen Time, if it’s turned off, then GOTO>Setting>Battery. You’ll get all information at a glance with statistics.

What one does with his days, what app one is accessing, what website one is exploring, what is posted on ones Facebook and Twitter etc., are precious raw metals for adversaries. Picture a run-down African country and their run-down hungry looking kids with porus baskets filtering muck and dirt. They are looking for diamonds and gold. They do it all day looking for just a speck to sell. Your colleagues will scour your life the same way for what you have, and what you consider dirt, is diamond and gold for them.

Along with smartphone, start carrying a Basic Phone too. If anyone asks for your phone, for whatever reasons, give them the Basic Phone. And see the fun!

Seeking the reverse
Then again reverse
Truth takes all the sides
If all the sides could be had
Makes us always short on truth
To rely on what we get
Make honest opinions
Or is this the definite truth
We all are led away
The truth as truthful as the horizon.

~NLS

The Florida Project is daintily constructed subtle movie. What makes this movie interesting is how it is approached and framed – shot by shot and scene by scene. It’s a story of a six year old girl going about her daily life. It’s as simple as that. But screenplay captures moments of her life and strings it into an interesting episodic story.

There are other actors too in the movie and they assist the child and are pretty main to the story, or to the snippets of stories. It’s important for the viewer to remain with the scenes and with the main actor. After a while the viewer will find himself traveling with the child and accompanying her in her various adventures.

The Florida Project is the movie of the innocent age. The parents are having a hard time yet the children are oblivious. They are living off charity, begging on the streets for one ice-cream cone, and sharing it among themselves, running around here and there and just being children. The color tones, the sound of the movie is bright and boisterous. Besides, there are lots of compassion.

The approach of the story – The Florida Project – is worth noticing. The point of view is through a child, and other children. Though the adults have their own problems, yet, their story is dealt through the eyes and expressions of a child. This consistency is maintained with every hard-luck families and neighbors. There are some poignant moments where a viewer will get engrossed watching the antics of the child and later realise what the adults may be doing in the other room.

The six year old actress, Brooklynn Prince as Moonee, along with her equally accomplished playmates, will take you on an adventure. The viewer just needs to hold their hands.

This award winning movie is an acquired taste. Meaning – “you’ll have to like it to like it.” Part of your labor will be to adamantly remain with the movie till the very end, just to find out exactly why the Academy of Motion Pictures Arts and Science, better known as Oscars, chose this as their best picture of 2021.

How the Oscar jury work, is known. Here is a link which show their method to choose winners. But what are the KRA, the key result areas on which the performance of the movie are appraised? Are there other aspects too, that are deciding? Like Geopolitics. Or Commercial interests.

For example, India, which had never much featured in the world of Beauty, suddenly, in 1994, won both Miss World and Miss Universe awards. With 1991 economic liberalization in India, a crowd of multinationals had entered Indian market and they all needed models. Well, what best way, than to create some nice well known faces for the media. In 6 years, from 1994 till 2000, India won 4 Miss World awards and in 1996, Bangalore itself hosted Miss World Beauty pageant. That’s two decades back. Since then, except 2012, beauty has escaped India. India not winning anything in the world indicates that the world just aren’t interested in India.

China has always been hot. The western world loves the Chinese (read) – the Chinese Market. And they do all the media tricks to signal their love. And China knows that its market is their power. And they are not shy to use that as a leverage. China have censored movies which does not support their politics and their narratives and it has forced changes in movie scripts and screen depictions. And Hollywood has complied.

Any which way, a message has gone across to China that Americans love them, even their multi-international-award-winning expats’ movie, which has pace, look, and feel like an amateur documentary.

To successfully watch Nomadland till the end, the viewer has to latch themselves, with chains and locks, to the chief protagonist, Fern (Frances McDormand) and stay with her for One Hour Fifty Minutes. The movie will never invite you. Instead, the viewer has to behave like an uninvited guest, rummaging garbage in every scene for tidbits of souvenirs.

If you pursue Nomadland till the end, you’ll get it. Or you won’t. It’s a matter of taste.

Most of the characters in the movie are grappling with cancer and looming death. Yet the movie is not dark, heavy and drab but light, effervescent and fun. The movie is based on a book which again references a book and its fictitious writer.

“The Fault in Our Stars,” is lead by two teenage characters of opposite sex, in which, one is morose and the other is peppy in a part of the story and thereafter their role reverses. Also they have a goal. They have to travel from US to Amsterdam to meet an author who wrote an optimistic book on cancer. This pilgrimage has its surprises and its consequences.

Shailene Woodley has an endearing looks and acting talent who pulls the viewer in for a rollercoaster ride of emotions. But the emotions are adjusted in appropriate measure. It’s a toned down melodrama and the conversations are mainly forward looking though they can’t avoid morbid talks at some juncture.

The story has depressing undertones yet one comes out of it not down but level. You’ll know why after you watch it.

A middle aged couple with two teenage boys are on a ski-holiday when a controlled avalanche misdirects into a open air cafe where the family is brunching. Upon approach of the rubble, the husband runs away abandoning his wife and two children. The avalanche rattles the cafe-people but is innocuous. Everything goes back to normal. Except the relationship between the husband and his wife and two children.

The rest of the movie then moves into subtler aspects of relationships. The wife and two children see their husband and father as someone weak. Obviously, the husband tries to justify himself by lying and undermining his wife. But in the end there is redemption arranged by the wife for the father,only.

This 1 hour 26 minutes movie is not that bad to deserve a rating of low 50%. The movie is pretty well made and well performed. Julia Louis-Dreyfus of Seinfeld fame who is a multi award winning actress is cast just for the right reasons.

When a tenuous bond of trust breaks between individuals, the resulting emotions are the most hardest to portray on screen. It’s here one get to know the difference between a pro and a tyro.

These days, “western” shows with scenes of gay and lesbian love and sex is pretty common because in most of the “western” world, LGBT is legal. But there was a time when same-sex association was a terrible crime. To know the extent of ostracization one should know about the fate of Alan Turing, a founding father of computer science and the Enigma. He was discovered to be gay and was chemically castrated. The movie, “The Imitation Game” on Netflix is based on his tragic life.

The movie ‘Carol’ explores lesbian relationship in the context of 1953 when it was “illegal”. To portray the characters in lesbian relationship are two astounding actresses – Cate Blanchett and Rooney Mara. This 2 hour movie may seem slow but the pace is just right to match the rhythm of that period and the tentativeness of such associations in those times. The two characters convey the subtle attractions and desires through their expressions. Dialogues seems to run parallel and used as hints.

Cate Blanchett is a veteran. But Rooney Mara with Audrey Hepburn looks matched the veteran, expression by expression.

I had written on this topic before (here, and here, and again here)

Here, I’ll recount another true story where personal privacy was broken into. My earlier posts dealt with surveillance of “manual labour” type where people watch on people. In this post, the surveillance I reveal is of a digital kind. But first, the story.

In my last company I had a colleague who quit to join an Investment bank. Couple of weeks into his new job, the colleague called me and said:”Sir, you have wonderful investments.” And thereafter, he called out my every investments in stocks, bonds and mutual funds. He knew how much money I had invested, the profit and loss of every investments, and how much money lay uninvested in my account. He had big plans on how and where to allocate my spare cash.

When the call ended, I felt as if I was naked. I rushed to the nearest branch of the investment bank, which is just a few minutes walk from my home across the highway and there, I blurted out my woes. To my surprise, the bank staff did not find my problem unusual. They said coolly – Any authorised staff can access investment accounts through customer’s registered mobile number.

Any authorised staff can access investment accounts through customer’s registered mobile number. Similarly, PAN and Aadhar can be used too.

So, the former colleague may not be only accessing mine but many of his old chums who had account with the same investment bank. If he is still working there, he may still be monitoring and informing. As for me, I dumped my Bank and moved elsewhere.

I realised the futility of my complaint. The source of my anger was personal – that someone known to me and to my other colleagues, used my ID to know my investment details. He may have shared it with others.

But let’s broaden the question – what if, unknowns know about others money details?

In the world we live now, data, if it exists, will become common knowledge. Then what is the protection? “Anonymity of Crowd.” If your head is not above the crowd, you’re safe, to some extent. But crowd should comprise of substantial number of people. This means, if you’re in Mumbai, a few crores here and there will not raise eyebrows. One could only get calls from Noida or Gurgaon for investments. But if one is above the crowd, Ambani or Tata or all those big stars, then they will be targeted. Recent “Ambani Bomb Scare” may be a big extortion case.

But what about small towns? Say a village of 100 people, “where everyone knows everyone not only by “name” but also by “how much money they have in the bank”, because the bank teller and peon are also village dwellers. Mr. Modi has encouraged villagers to open bank accounts which they have and where Mr. Modi dutifully deposits money. So everyone’s equal. He will be a foolish villager to deposits his extra earning in the same account. He will invite dacoits. Villagers of India are no fools. For eons they have buried money secretly. That’s a best way.

On this “anonymity of crowd”, let’s take a test case on how this can be defeated.

Suppose, a person in Noida gets your number. He will keep on calling you from his different numbers. That’s the most they do. Now suppose, a person from Noida, instead of calling you, calls your colleague and says: so and so has so much money in the bank, so, why don’t you tell him to invest in “flower-pot” land in Noida. And the next day he calls again, this time a different colleague and says the same thing.

This is a good trick, isn’t it. But you see what’s happening. Gradually, your anonymity is being eroded. At a level of a large city, you’re a crowd. But at a level of your workspace, you’re a target. In other words, your information, say, at the level of Amazon has a different bite than your information at the level of your H.R..

In my previous company, there were people, at “important looking” posts, who “googled” the internet for information on other people. I had posted some work related Q&A in some obscure website, that too was discovered. I had opened an account in a forum where I posted anonymously, even that was uncovered. And watch this – my Facebook posts used to be discussed with higher management.

Privacy and Surveillance is an exciting subject and topics of many movies and TV and books. But it’s painful and scary when the same hits home. My oversensitivity towards this topic springs from my rabid past life where I gave birth to ghosts, some of whom still haunt me from places up above.

‘Behind Her Eyes’ is not mind blowing but will blow the mind in the end. It has six episodes and I watched the sixth episode twice just to make sense of what actually happened. When I understood the sixth, then I realised I had misunderstood the first five. The last time this complication happened to me was with movie, ‘Inception.’ But that movie has meat. In ‘Behind Her Eyes’ I choked on gravy.

The British actress Simona Brown with expressive eyes and British accent is very watchable. The British actor Tom Bateman with Scottish accent is hoarse. This has rightly been criticised. If scotts speak like that they should be given independence from Britain. Tyler Howitt, is the most comfortable child actor.

‘Behind Her Eyes’ is a bewildering story. When things settle down in the end, the viewers will puzzle ‘who is what and where.’ The solve will not be worth the bother.